love and strange horses *

I am convinced my soul was constructed to belong entirely to a life of making up songs, just as the cowboy’s was to rope calves and the sun was made to lay its palm over the window in my studio this late afternoon.

I spent time this week with two lawyers and someone from A&R. All of them pushing papers with big words and lots of numbers to keep the conversation going.

I have to confess there’s something about being with the fine people who work at these jobs that leaves me feeling alone. I’m the only one of my kind when I’m with them: an outlier, not easy to lasso into their carefully scripted conversations. I stand at the crescent of my hoofs at these meetings, head jerking away from the halter, ears searching for the stablegirl’s caress.

It’s different when I’m among my own kind, musicians and other artists, or when I’m home doing all my comfortable alone things: making up songs, tuning an instrument, reading, or just looking the day away in a pasture empty of everything but wildflowers and witchgrass.

At these times, I feel peaceful and occupied with all the things I know I’m meant to do.

strange horses

* The title of a book by the amazing Nathalie Handal

11 thoughts on “love and strange horses *

  1. This definitely resonates. That being surrounded by people with their own agendas and no one at all like you in sight. There’s a very specific kind of loneliness that stems from that. Beautifully expressed.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ah, but everyone is alone. That’s what life is all about. Individuality. Perhaps, in death we will merge together and all be one. Perhaps, that is where we came from before birth and what we miss when we feel lonely. So, perhaps the best we can do is be thankful for our inner selves, hold hands, share our gifts and sing to one another.

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  3. Goodness Tony you have a brilliant way with words. Also, I understand this feeling of loneliness in the company of those versed in areas completely alien to those you find familiar. The other feeling, the immediate sense of belonging, of community with those like-minded creatives is such a welcome break from the norm that I often find myself reaching out to strangers whose work I enjoy, desperate for that feeling again.

    Liked by 1 person

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